Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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