Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize