no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize