Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
this hospital has no fireball
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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