I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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