My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It's official drugs can't kill me
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize