we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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