Nicole vs. Life
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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