the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Can I color on your dick again?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
