I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
