Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize