I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Your dad touched me again.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
