im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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