Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
