Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
