chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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