Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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