Its about making memories worth repressing
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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