Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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