one two three fourrrrnication!
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize