Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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