Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
