dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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