so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just cropdusted the office
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
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