But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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