I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
