Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
