Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
