I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
