Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
