Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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