He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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