Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
We have started to decorate penises.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
