And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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