didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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