some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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