Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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