In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Did I show you my penis last night?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
