you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
