Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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