Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
