Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Oh god it's open bar.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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