I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
sarcasm needs its own font
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
