'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
