I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize