margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize