Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We left an ass print on the piano.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
