I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
