they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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