its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
