scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
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