She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
