no. you can't hotbox the world.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
